– Starting the game, go through the FAQs and arrive in the first city: /b/.- Look around, talk to people. When you are ready to leave, talk to the guard. He won’t let you leave alone. So go into Anonymous house and talk to him again. He will follow you. It would be a good idea now to sleep in the Inn to get your HP and RP back to full. Leave the town.- Now, you should spend some time in this area to level up your characters for a bit. When you are ready, go up. You will find a bridge to the right, but you can’t get through there yet. Instead go up again, into the cave.- In the cave there is only one puzzle, which is to pay attention to the order of the fire that appears on the ground. The order for me was this:2 3 1 4
– Leaving the caves you will get to another open area, and then to the city of /c/. Explore around, talk to people, and then go to the right wing of the city to meet some enemies. After talking to them, you will be able to enter the temple located in the left wing of the city. Go there and enter your first dungeon.
– The first puzzle is a roundabout area. Choose one side and take it, arriving where you started. Then, choose the opposite side and go around it again. I don’t remember if you have to do this 2 or 3 times, but after that, go back down where the stepping stones are. There are new stepping stones, use them to find an area with a switch. Flip it and go back to the roundabout. There will be a door at the top now.
– Entering the door, you will pass through a room with statues. After this room, is the library. Talk to the person and then start walking around the room, looking for a book, to trigger a monster battle. After killing the monsters you will get a book. (Important note: Do not leave this area without first obtaining the book, you will need it later in the game.) Read the book to solve the riddle (it’s easy) and use your solution on the statues. Doing so will make the door in the library open.
– You will find an area with some torches. Remember the exact location of the torches (printscreen?) because you will soon get to a dark room where you have to step exactly where the torches were. Doing so will allow you to progress, reaching another library.
– Talk to the enemies, and defeat Pdf.exe. After that you will appear outside the temple, back on /c/.
– Now make your way back all the way (on the cave, take the shortcut ladder – thanks, Christopher!) to the entrance of /b/ and go downwards . Go past the desert till you get to Twitter Port. There, defeat all the pirates and the Captain, Kelly. After that, explore the city, talk to the people and take a job from Hill (delivering nudes to Hatey in /b/). Do the job taking the envelope back to /b/ and back to Twitter Port to get 100,000 posts from Hill. Use it to pay for Kelly’s boat.
– Controlling Kelly’s boat, your goal is on the bottom at the right, navigate in that direction. It’s pretty far, so expect to fight some sea monsters on the way. When you get there, talk to Kelly to rest on the boat and fill up your HPs and RPs.
– Now just go up and enter the next dungeon. This will take you to the Lulu puzzle, which looks really fun to solve. Unfortunately, it didn’t work for me, so I had to use a trick Shrimp included in the game for when it doesn’t work.
(Stand on the tile shown above and press Enter/Space 5 times. That will take Lulu to the final pedestal and open the door). I recommend trying to do the puzzle first, and only using the trick if it doesn’t work for you 🙂
– Enter the now opened door and use the teleporter. Go to the top of the tower, use the teleporter. Now you’ll get to the clouds. Use the teleporter on the top and left. Then the one at the left and bottom. Then the only other one on the cloud. Then the other one on the cloud again. And then the one at the bottom and right. That will take you to another tower. Enter the door.
– You will get to a big room with three pedestals in the middle. You will have to enter each of the doors to the left and right to collect all three orbs. There is a glitch with the blue orb (bottom left door), so if you find yourself stuck there (chest won’t come down at the last part, even after going through all the spikes puzzles – plus, the door to the main hall is gone) then go to the uppermost room of the puzzle – the one with the three parallel holes at the bottom of the labyrinth, and stand in the extreme lower-right corner of the room. Then press Enter and you’ll be warped back to the Orb lobby with your prize in your inventory. With the three orbs, put them in the pedestals in the main room and the door will open.
– Exit and you will meet some enemies, and you will have to face Fubar. Kill him and continue your journey going back to the boat. Now, just exit Svetlana’s island to the left and immediately go up. You will reach another land and ILB (the Forum) Inn is just ahead 🙂 Talk to people and continue your journey to the great city of /m/.
– Arriving in /m/ you can now spend A LONG TIME exploring this enormous city. It is really, REALLY big, so if you want to see all of it, make sure you have free time. It took me more than 2 and a half hours exploring it. The left gate takes you to the bridge thing from the beginning of the game (where the guard asks you for a drink), so that’s a quick way to get back to /b/. The right gate takes you to the waterfall. When you feel like you are done, go to Shrimp’s Castle, the one on the bottom/left (southwest). Find King Shrimp and talk to him. He will tell you to find a cliff to sit down.
P.S.: I’m not sure if the order of the Kings is fixed or if I just happened to do them this way. Anyway, you are free to try to talk to the 4 Kings in a different order 🙂
– The cliff is the place you started the game. So get there quickly through the bridge thing accessible from the left exit gate. Sit on the cliff and wait for the Intermission. Return to King Shrimp and he will join your party. If you have the monies, go to ‘Sup Mart and equip him now. You need permission from 4 of the kings to leave /m/ through the Social Road, so now go talk to King Jelly (northeast). He will send you on a quest.
– King Jelly’s Quest: leave /m/ through the east gate and get to the entrance of the waterfall. Defeat the blobs and enter the cave.
– Now navigate through the dungeon. There are a few puzzles, but you’ll be able to figure them out. Eventually, you will reach a big “break the ice” puzzle. Because it is very large and it might take some time, here is the solution:
– After that, you get to fight Porphyria. After defeating Porphyria, go back to talk to Jelly, so he can join your party. From there, head straight for Kansas’ Castle. Surprisingly, King Kansas does not make you do any side quests for him, he just accepts your request and sends word to the gate. I guess now it’s time to talk to King GMaster, the last King. But first, you have to “buttown” him for him to grant you a hearing. For this go to Madison’s Inn and ask about Gmaster’s guards. She’ll make it happen.
– King Gmaster will challenge you to battle. You will have to survive for 15 turns on the battle, so prepare well for the fight. When defeated, GMaster Red will join your party. That’s it for the 4 Kings, now head out the Social Road and continue with your journey! I would suggest buying equipment for all your party now at Sup Mart, since you are there. If you got the cash, go shopping!
– Leave /m/ and go north. You will get to a fork in the road where you can choose to try your might at the Pit of 100 Faggots or head to Skype. Don’t try the pit if you don’t have the ability to “climb fences” yet, you will not be able to go through all the levels without it. In Skype, talk to me at the entrance of the city \o/ (I’m the three headed snake, lololol)
– After exploring Skype, head into the Archives house and find Masonprof. He will ask you 5 questions, which you have to answer correctly to proceed.
1. How many people in Twitter Port? 20
2. How much does 3 seafoods, 2 antivirus berries and 1 thursday night balm cost? 380P
3. How many times does Heyguise play Hide and Seek in /m/? 3
4. What was the element of Porphyria’s third form? Water
5. How many butterflies in the 4 first areas of the game? 3
– Guess what happens then? Yes, Masonprof joins the party. Now exit through the west wing of the city, the exit that leads to 3v3’s Spire. You won’t be able to go far, as there is some commotion with Nexx going on there. You have to find the Guards Compound in the city, so just go back to where the sign is (where it says 3v3’s spire to the west) and head north. You will meet a guard and tell him something to make him leave his post. Now enter that area and into the big red roofed house. In there find the chest and put on the Guard outfit. Now exit west again.
– Talk to Fayo and enter Nexx’s house. You will find some puzzles inside (the falling rocks part is kinda hard, but keep trying and you’ll make it). Defeat Nexx and continue the journey. Into the snow you will soon meet Caleb again. Continue on and take a quick rest at Zangief’s Inn.
– Now, for a really cool, big surprise, take the next turn left, and head west right after Zangief’s Inn. Isn’t that cool? 😀
– Go back and carry on north. Welcome to 3v3’s Spire. Just go ahead north and then left to find a room with floating doors. I took the first one from left to right in the row (the purple one), so this is what this walkthrough will follow. Just kill several monsters till you get to a puzzle room with spikes. The trick is to step only on the slightly darker tiles. In the next room, jump into the pit. Now go up the stairs and you will find a room with some animals.
– The animals will tell you which place they prefer to be standing in in the room. Pay attention to what they say and continue north. When you get to the puzzle room, put them in the correct order:
cat – goat – frog – bull – pink frog – dog
– Get the key from the chest and go back to the main room and into the locked door on the south/east. Get to snow room with two snow men. This is kind of tricky at first, but it’s easy once you get the hang of it. You need to put each of the snow men on the dry spot on the floor, pink one in front of the pink crystal and blue one in front of the blue crystal. To achieve that, use the rocks as barriers to trap them. This is how I did it:
– Alright, back to the main room. Push the lever to build a bridge to this door. Go in and use the teleport. Get into the room and notice the 3 orbs needed to open the door are already in the pedestals. Go into the door north and read the note from the dead guy. Then go back, TAKE THE 3 ORBS with you and go trough each of the 3 puzzles to place the orbs in the chests. First puzzle is the one in the bottom/left, the quiz:
(enter super secret treasure balcony) Kaylaa
– For the second puzzle, let’s take the room on the right. It’s a downhill speedrun, it can be quite tricky. The secret is not speed, but not taking your finger off the down key. You can get stuck in a wall and still not die if you don’t let go ever of the down key. In the end, again, place the orb in the chest.
– Last puzzle, the dark labyrinth. Wow, this was hard (THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!) But it’s fun, try it! If you get bored and can’t get around to it, here is a (very poorly made) “map” of it:
– That’s it! Now exit, main hall, door, teleport and you’ll get on the top of 3v3’s Spire. Prepare for trouble! And make it double! Now it’s time to face Cornelia! Meow, that´s right!
– After the battle and the cutscenes with Boxxyfan, you’ll be at the foot of 3v3’s Spire again. Now it’s journey back to Skype to meet with Princess June. She will tell you to meet with Eyrev, who will give you the full disclosure of the whole story and who Catie really is. Now it’s off to Unichan!
– Leave Skype through the east exit and go east till you get to a gate. Oops, I mean “fence” 😛 Now go back a little bit and north to BoxxyForever. The first house on the left is Alex’s. Talk to him to give him back any Missing Painting you might have come across in your journey so far. Next, go into the mine to save Jezza and Ttocsn. Don’t get lost!
– Fight the first Kebab and ride the minecarts to get to the switch. Flip it to get a rock and shove it on top of the plaque to open the red door. Soon you’ll get to ride the cart again, this time choosing directions. On this first ride first choose right, then flip the switch. Return and now choose left, to go through the red door.
– On the next ride, first go up and get the chest. Then choose right, and then up again, through the door, to get another chest. Now, coming back, choose right and go outside. Pass the maze (look for the big crystals with no little crystals on the side for passages) and off to another cart ride. Another Kebab, another exit outside and now a dead end. Your party will fall through the ground in another area. Meet Jezza and Ttocsn and get ready to fight another Kebab. A BIG Kebab.
– At the Greek Temple you will learn how to climb fences (I’m greek dood!) Enjoy an amazing sequence. My god, it’s full of fences! With yout new ability, circumvent the small town and climb that fence on the left side.
Now that you can climb fences, ARE YOU A BAD ENOUGH DUDE to go back to The Pit of 100 Faggots?
Cause that’s what I did B|
If you beat it, you get a new party member: Crissa ^_^
– Off to Unichan again, climb the fence and cross the bridge to meet Kelly and the ship crew again. Now set sail and go straight east. When you get to dry land start climbing the mountain going north. When entering the temple, you will be greated by Tang and other oldfags. After that, reach a place with stepping stones, then past it and continue up north til you get top. This is it! You have finally reached Boxxy’s Spire!